Theory of Devolution (by Darth Paul)

I’ve wanted to repost this for a long long long long time now. It’s probably my favorite of all my brother’s blog entries.  Too bad he isn’t writing now. And he’s not like me…I keep returning to correct grammatical/typo mistakes I made. Some I’d still catch after the 5th reading, and some I’d catch 3 months later, after re-reading.  My brother writes as quickly as he would think. Sometimes my sister and I complain about the depth of his insights being ruined by his Jejenese. (“Ano ba, kuya! Ang tali-talino mo tapos Jejemon ka!”)

Anyway, here are his rather optimistic thoughts about the devolution of the human race. Copy and pasted directly from his blog. I did not edit a single word because the errors, caused by spontaneity, are somewhat charming. 🙂

Theory of Devolution
by Paulo Romeo V. Lapa (a.k.a. Darth Paul)

Jan 8, ’09 11:08 AM

“At some future period, not very distant as measured by centuries, the civilized races of man will almost certainly exterminate, and replace the savage races throughout the world.”
Charles Darwin

The Cambrian life forms ruled Earth for about 54+/- 1.7 million years, Dinosaurs ruled for about 160 million years.  Man, however, has been standing upright for 2 million years, thinking for 200,000 yet we are closer to causing our own destruction than any specie that has ever walked the Earth.  Cambrian life forms are from single celled organisms, and Dinosaurs are over compensating for having small… brains.  It really is disturbing to know that ooz and goo, and pea brained bird/lizards are doing a much better job at managing Earth than us.

In the ancient days, in the savage animal kingdom, one had to be faster, stronger, more fierce, or adapted quicker than the next creature… Survival of the fittest and Natural Selection…  No one watches over you, and the trick to surviving would probably be, being able to run faster than your friend.  When someone mentioned “King of the Hill” one would be thinking the large Sabretooth running the savanna or  the Rex roaming during the Cretaceous.  But man does not have a natural predator, we have been top of the food chain, we fear no place or thing, no fear of any animal barging through our homes and feasting on our fat and meat.  We are the preditors now: in our drawers, watching TV, eating Cheetos, scratching our nuts… fearsome, “Grrrr”…  Yep, cute little bunnies just scampered away in fright.

Since the advent of democracy from the Greeks, number usually has dictated the swing of power.  This is because, of course, democracy protects the interest of the many (most of the time).  Now, it was not necessarily the strongest that ruled, the weakest in the pack is not necessarily shunned or killed.  That means, one could be an idiot, or a danger to the pack, and one would be, almost be assured that no one will tear his jugular.  We have actually proven that Democracy is a paradox, we need it for an organized society, but therein lies our destruction.  Idiots could band together and elect one of their own (see Erap, Bush).  They have strength in numbers, two people with an IQ of 80 will beat a guy with an IQ of 160 most of the time.

And because we are a thinking race, the smartest of our race will be thinking of family planning and being responsible, while short sighted people will be humping like rabbits. This would mean that we would probably have a smart to stupid ratio of about 1:10 in the next 10 years and will multiply exponentially over the years.  In a few decades, idiots would be like wire tapping, “its everwhere!”…  Its frighteningly inevitable, try telling people of recycling, renewable sources of energy, responsibility, or accountability, and you’d probably get an answer of a fart and a smile. 

It all sounds inevitable but I do have another theory.  Someday, when we are in the brink of destruction, dying, heaving, coughing, wallowing in our own filth and destruction, we are going to be forced to pick up our mess, fix everything and make sure that we never go through that again.  When one looks at it that way, one could say that in a round about way, we are on our way to creating Eutopia.  

Image credits:
All clip art in Discovery Education’s Clip Art Gallery created
by Mark A. Hicks, illustrator.


  1. JennyO

    June 9, 2010 at 3:30 pm

    Great post, Paul!
    As for you, Bea – “I keep returning to correct grammatical/typo mistakes I made. Some I'd still catch after the 5th reading, and some I'd catch 3 months later, after re-reading.” – INTP ka nga! Ito ang isa sa mga palatandaan. XD

  2. skysenshi

    June 10, 2010 at 4:33 am

    Hehe, yep! Am an INTP. I should post about multiple intelligence next time. Hehehe.

  3. Xiao

    June 24, 2010 at 2:44 pm

    [insert imaginary “Dear Diary”-ish opening]

    So it was Philit class, we were tasked to read something, and that something was entitled, “My Own Theory of Devolution”.

    This time it was from a Filipino writer, Jessica Zafra. Seeing as how similar the titles are (ie to one of the entries) I can't help but write about it, then write about it, I shall.

    Be forewarned that whatever will be written here are from my thoughts, my head, my noggin' of my own randomness, moving on– so my mind went like this:

    “Whoa, devolution, so… the opposite of evolution, right? Riiight, of course it is.”

    “… [I read it in silence, getting the point of her essay, but can't help but read it again to fully grasp her point, besides, it amused me enough to do so]”

    “Round 2, here goes: So the writer's like, '…here's what I think about alcohol…', then I was like, 'okay, eventually if you drink too much alcohol you will first experience this symptom– blurry vision– because of that predicament you will either semi-consciously act like an ape [I imagine an imaginary person going through this as I think].'

    An ape's not so bad, but get a load of what will happen to you next because as an ape you still continue to gulp down that beer– you fall– 'yeah you fall, because you not-so-surpsingly as an ape, drank some more and now you have become a reptile; that would be something lower than an ape, also because now you're down on the ground slithering your way to that next very alcoholic bottle'.

    So I continue to read, what's next?

    'Oh, drink too much alcohol and the volume of your voice goes up higher that it can be heard 2 block away– she calls this the Politician stage– whoa, wait… politician?'
    I continue to read the next line, 'Oh right, she meant like an obnoxious crocodile who exposes his darkest secrets to strangers and insults his friends… all because of alcohol, tsk tsk.'

    I still imagine an imaginary person doing this craziness and I continued to read, 'At this point, you still continue to devour alcohol like cake on a 5-year old's birthday that you become a fish, this being the next stage, you devolve [this was the word she used, I thought it… cool] as such because you swim your way out of your current state your brain all pickled [so I go imagining someone having a pickle for a brain… then shook the silly thought away with a harhar]'

    I continued to read the long paragraph, nearing the end, 'So far, you've been an ape, a reptile, still a reptile but more specifically a crocodile, then a fish, what's next? Well, it depends on where you end up; on a sidewalk, stuck on a tree, on a dirty, fuzzy rug of a pub, or if you got lucky, your bedroom but it cannot be helped that you will still end up devolutionized [it's not exactly a word, but sounds way cooler than devolve] into a rock, a non-living thing little kids like to kick around the playground.'

    So that was what was going on in my mind based on what she wrote made a little more interestingly confusing through this writing.

    In the end, 'because it doesn't just end at being a rock, you evolve once more and wonder what you've been doing all night and that very night you end up going through it all again.'”

    That reading assignment amused me somehow.

  4. Xiao

    June 25, 2010 at 4:54 pm

    Miss, I know the updated version are minutes late from the submission deadline, but they were finished before 11pm, it's just that the internet connection was that slow… it took a while to upload and post

    that is all

    Regina S.

  5. skysenshi

    June 25, 2010 at 10:07 pm

    contest entries received. 😀

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