Transformers: Dark of the Moon

“At least Megan Fox was useful.”

That was my Facebook status, which I posted as soon as I got out of the theater last Friday night. In a nutshell, Transformers: Dark of the Moon was a waste of PhP300 (I hate that I always have no choice but to watch in stereoscopic 3D because they have the best schedules) and wow…that was 2 hours 30 minutes of my life that I can never ever get back.

If I added about PhP300 more, I could have had a massage while sleeping and then enjoyed an eat-all-you-can buffet at Wensha Spa. It is not comfy to sleep in a movie house because you can’t recline the seats. And the amount of money we spent for this crap made me think thrice about walking out even when I was dying to.

With me wanting Megan Fox back, who isn’t actually the greatest actress there is, that only means one thing: the new girl’s existence was so banal that I started hating Michael Bay. Will actually avoid ALL Michael Bay movies from now on. Don’t get me wrong, I am a Third Wave feminist. I am all for the expression of female sexuality and I don’t care if you’re straight or queer. But she is just ridiculous. Sure, we want eye candy, but at least make her do something besides strut her assets and scream, for crying out loud! (I get that they want Megan Fox out, but at least bring her kick-ass character back even if they get a new actress.) You can actually remove the new girl from the movie and it wouldn’t have affected the story. At all.

Pure annoyance, really.

Hm. Wait. Now that I think about it, let’s just scrap all the human beings in the movie and concentrate on the robots, shall we?  There’s already enough drama about Cybertron to begin with. We don’t need to add human dramatics to that. Also, why do the Decepticons have all the cool machinery when the Autobots sacrifice the good robots? Bring in the Dinobots, jeez!

Ok, enough ranting. I’ll just stay away from Michael Bay movies and save myself some grief.


  1. animetric

    July 4, 2011 at 11:58 pm

    You should've just watched the free screening by Nuffnang they gave away so many tickets and it was so easy to join hahahaha! XD

  2. Jenny Ortuoste

    July 5, 2011 at 1:42 am

    Thanks for this review. You just saved me P900! (me and kids) 🙂

  3. Mom-Friday

    July 5, 2011 at 1:52 am

    SO grateful I watched with Nuffnang tickets!
    It was all-robot-action and that's it. 
    Hubby and I felt the editing was too “rushed” if there's such a term, and yes, the girl is a pretty hot wallflower. 🙂

    I don't like watching 3D either, mahal pa! Maybe if you didn't spend 300 baka you wouldn't feel as bad, hehehe….

  4. Dementedchris

    July 5, 2011 at 2:09 am

    I'm sure you'll have better luck with Harry Potter. 😛

  5. Orven Desembrana

    July 5, 2011 at 2:23 am

    It was a mess of a film though I can't really complain since I downloaded a bootleg to see what's up with it. (and I had the power to go back and forth on scenes I wanted to skip or rewatch) Still, its a good closure to a trilogy, and good riddance too! Now I can concentrate on my DC movies. *dont fail me again, Man of Steel*

  6. Karina Ysabel Nario

    July 5, 2011 at 5:23 am

    Ok, noting this. I think I'll just watch Harry Potter, oh, three times? 😀

  7. John Ray Cabrera

    July 5, 2011 at 6:27 am

    yeah, they can volt in with the Dinobots while Decepticons with the Zoids. 🙂

    i heard that the girl was such a waste of talent fee. i haven't watched the movie yet but i am planning to watch it in my iphone only tonight, before going to bed.

    the movie did indeed receive a flurry of comments and disgust:

    1) it wasn't shoot in 3D camera, so the 3D of it is juts purely digital mastering

    2) the girl that was supposed to fill in the Megan-Fox-void was such a waste of character

    3) the robots especially the Decepticons look like robots from a Pinoy film Resiklo, they look like shards of junk metals Epoxy-ied together just to come up with a menacing looking villain(why do villains in the movies always look aweful, contrary of what they look in real life)

    i've hear they have Tremor robots too?

  8. skysenshi

    July 5, 2011 at 9:21 am

    Sobrang hectic ng schedule ko, luxury na ang movies or the time for it kaya hindi ko ma-time ng tama yung mga events. @_@

  9. skysenshi

    July 5, 2011 at 9:22 am

    Haha, ako naman nakulangan sa robot-action. It's all human drama for me. The good thing about spending for it, I could actually bash it the way I did just now. Haha. Minsan lang ako mainis sa movie, and this movie just reached my quota of annoying ones.

  10. skysenshi

    July 5, 2011 at 9:23 am

    I am very very very sure. Haha! I wasn't a Harry Potter fan…until the last movie. That really blew me away. Looking forward to the very last installment.

  11. skysenshi

    July 5, 2011 at 9:24 am

    If they don't show the Dynobots in whatever planned installation, they'd better forget it.

  12. skysenshi

    July 5, 2011 at 9:26 am

    Everything you heard is true. Haha! I usually like movies that critics lambast to death…but this movie is just really plain insulting. I'm on mega-rant mode, which…I'm not sure if I've done with my previous movie reviews. Maybe in Resiklo? Haha!

  13. Jerome Asuncion

    July 7, 2011 at 8:05 am

    I do not want to add anything, in fact I am willing to shell out 300 bucks for any cinematic output that satisfies the standards of what a real film is, otherwise will erode the pseudo-magnificence of the movie by utilizing formalism (elements of cinema) , structuralism and other paradigms that will highlight and escalate the non-contributing  essence of Michael Bay's thrash for exorbitant ebullience for cultural and aesthetic values.  I'll just bring my ass to view Tree of Life and several entries in the Cinemalaya 2011.

  14. skysenshi

    July 7, 2011 at 11:40 pm

    True! I don't mind shelling out PHP300 as long as it not merely visual. I wanna go to Cinemalaya as well! 😀

  15. DLSL

    July 8, 2011 at 11:16 pm

    it's been FULL HOUSE over the past week, so I hope I can bring my children to see it today. We already purchased the tickets last Thursday ensuring we got good seats to enjoy the movie. Looking fwd to see it today… Transformers Rock!

  16. skysenshi

    July 9, 2011 at 4:48 am

    Hm. I don't know if I can recommend this to children, though. It's not like the Transformers of my childhood…Too many things that should be censored for young 'uns.

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