Portofino Resort (Cebu)

Rating: ★★
Category: Other

(Pictures to follow. This is what I hate about not having my own camera when I go on trips.)

All right, let’s start with the good. The cottages are pretty cheap at $100. Ours already had two airconditioned rooms with two beds — one single and one double in each room. The curtains are thick for complete privacy and there are dressers, open closets with hangers and a (rather empty) refrigerator. There were the standard hotel necessities like towels and soaps but I usually prefer using my own. During our first night there, I was actually quite impressed with the capiz windows and adjacent verandas that face the beach area.

Dinner buffet was quite good as you have healthy and very unhealthy selections. Hehe. Perfect for people who want to go organic and for their companions who do not mind clogging their arteries with all that trans fat. And with the beach front being nearly empty, it felt like we owned the place. In fact, we enjoyed the band we hired to play for that night’s celebration.

The next morning, however, was like waking up to a nightmare. My sister and I shared the same bed and it turns out that it had bed bugs (surot). We were scratching all the way back to Manila. We have a series of ugly red splotches on our feet, legs and arms and we lived the next few nights without sleep, knowing that we’d scratch the night away unconsciously. I’m actually afraid of how my legs would look like after the ordeal is over. I cannot even wear shorts. I will be posting pictures later, for those who are not faint of heart. EDIT: Pictures of bites uploaded at http://www.coolay.com/2008/05/12/portofino-resort-cebu/.

Breakfast…was slow. I was afraid it would be lunch time before it could be served. That was how long we waited. We also didn’t appreciate that people who came later got serviced first. The coffee came first and while I don’t usually drink coffee on an empty stomach, I knew that if I waited for the food, the coffee would become colder than a two-day-old corpse. When finally our orders arrived…well, they got mixed up. My sister was very specific: scrambled eggs to match her continental breakfast. Her eggs were sunny side up.

It was a waste bringing our swim suits because the beach got filled up pretty quickly after breakfast. There wasn’t a space that wasn’t occupied by one noisy family after another. There was the pool but well, after the surot bites, we were loathe to go in there.

That was one heck of a ruined trip. It also ruined the last few remaining free days I have as I cannot wear bathing suits without scaring other people off. Next time, I’d prolly go back to crashing a relative’s or a friend’s place, like I usually do when I travel.


  1. Rowena Wendy Lei

    May 12, 2008 at 1:18 am

    Peter got bitten by bed bugs in Sabangan Beach Resort. Not a pretty sight, buti na lang yun kids hindi. XD

  2. Bea Lapa

    May 12, 2008 at 1:26 am

    ayokong magka-peklat. waaaaaaaaaah! i mean, it was ok when we were young. but our skin can't regenerate as fast now. huhuhuhuhuhu.

  3. Alexandra Lapa

    May 12, 2008 at 2:10 am

    Nahihiya lang ako magbitch fit sa harap ni Ate Celine pero juskooooo…kaya kinain ko na lang yung sunny side up, pero otherwise ibabalik ko yun. Eh gutom na rin kasi ako.

    Hindi mura ayun no! Pucha.

    Tsaka yung mga ref sa ganyang resort wala talagang laman ano, haha, para lang yun sa mga nagdadala ng food, to keep them from getting spoiled. Sa hotels lang may ganun. xD Natawa rin ako sayo nagexpect ka kasi ng food. Sana lang diba may lechon dun!

  4. Danica Cervantes

    May 12, 2008 at 2:26 am

    Next time come to Bohol with us!

  5. Bea Lapa

    May 12, 2008 at 2:29 am

    Hindi ba mura yun? Parang mura eh kasi 2 bedrooms tapos maganda naman ang room. Di ko lang akalain na may take home tayong kadiri.

    BTW, uploaded the pics. Click the link in the middle of the review kasi di siya for public consumption.

    I thought I still had enough time left for more traveling but this mishap just ruined my remaining free days…

  6. Danica Cervantes

    May 12, 2008 at 2:39 am

    Yikes at your bites!

    Next time when my dad plans to go and you're free.. lets go okay?

  7. Bea Lapa

    May 12, 2008 at 2:44 am

    Yep. Ey, read my sister's bitchier version. Hahahahaha~! Her descriptions are funny.

    I have steroidal cream now, to keep the itchiness at bay. I told her to buy Betnovate.

  8. Jamie Barredo

    May 12, 2008 at 2:51 am

    i saw your bedbug bites oh nose! ang kati nga nyan!! poor you.

  9. Bea Lapa

    May 12, 2008 at 3:00 am

    makating masakit. steroids help. huhuhuhuhuhu! ang bakasyon kooooooh!

  10. Jayvee Elvert

    May 12, 2008 at 2:29 pm

    mura daw dyan sabi ng friend ko pero di maganda. hehehe

  11. Bea Lapa

    May 12, 2008 at 3:36 pm

    ang alam ko lang, hindi maganda kinalabasan ng binti namin ng kapatid ko. waaaaaaah!

  12. Jayvee Elvert

    May 12, 2008 at 3:42 pm

    waaa!!! see you thursday. oisht, kunin mo na ang photos kay Cris….di ko pa na-post party pics natin….hehhehehe

  13. Bea Lapa

    May 12, 2008 at 3:45 pm

    yeah… gusto ko na nga rin makita.

  14. Cj Padilla

    May 12, 2008 at 7:35 pm

    OUCH! Those bedbug bites are nasty! Tsk tsk! The hotel should be reported the the health bureau…

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